beliefs confidence emotional intelligence mindset self love

Aquarian Age Advice

Nov 21, 2021

As a teen, I LOVED reading the advice column in magazines and newspapers. I loved the way the tone and advice in the Sunday paper my parents read were different to my Just Seventeen or More Magazine, and yet the questions were kinda the same.

Wanting to be heard, seen and supported in our times of struggle and feeling alone in our challenges are universal, regardless of age we have a drive to come into community and allow our pain to be heard so that we might feel less alone and know that the way we feel is 'normal'

This is one of the reasons I hold a monthly circle and why I love to answer people's questions.

For a year or so I wrote an (Aquarian age) Advice Column for Soulacy Magazine.

I also answer questions every day inside The MAVEN HAVEN 

If you have a question you'd like answered or have a platform that you'd like me to be a resident 'Agony Aunt' for, please get in touch.


Dear Ebonie,

I’ve heard two conflicting schools of thought when it comes to manifesting. One says that you need to have precise clarity on what it is you’re trying to manifest so the universe knows what to start working toward to send your way. The other says that the universe/The Divine already knows what you want because, well, it knows everything, so rather than focusing on getting clarity, focus on keeping yourself open to what you’re meant to receive. What are your thoughts on this?


Hi Michelle,

This is a great question. First off, there is no ‘right’ answer to this. Although we live in a time when everyone seems to be the expert on everyone else, the only real expert on you, is you and there is no shortcut to understanding yourself. 

That's actually what you are here to discover and learn.

Who are you?

How do you work?

What is your legacy?

What are you here to experience?

There is no one way to manifest. Believing that there is one way or even two ways to manifest is simplistic at best and dangerous at worst.

Also, while I am at it, manifesting isn’t ‘creating’ anything, it's calling forth that which already exists somewhere.

Manifest: to make evident or certain by showing or displaying

On some timeline or frequency there is a reality in which that which you desire to manifest exists, you are attempting to match yourself to that frequency or timeline in order to be on the same time / space continuum as it.

Recently, I have seen a lot of talk about whether someone is a nonspecific or specific manifestor in terms of their Human Design.

And, I want to make clear that there is nothing actually taught about this in the Human Design original teachings, but it is in fact an interpretation of an aspect of the ‘Variable’ concept.

‘Variables’ are represented by the 4 arrows on the top of a bodygraph, and each arrow either points to the left or to the right. 

The arrow in the bottom right corner is the personality node variable and some people suggest that if it points left you are ‘specific’ and if it points to the right ‘non-specific’ - sometimes these are referred to as ‘abstract’ and ‘general’ - the idea being that left favours ‘yang’ or ‘masc’ approach and right is more ‘yin’ or ‘feminine’ in its energy.

The idea is that if you are a specific manifestor, you work best when getting really specific about your desire and if you are nonspecific you work best when you tap into the feeling or ‘what kinda thing would delight me’

According to more old school HD teachers, the personality node tells of the individual's perspective as either having a focused (left) or peripheral (right) view of their environment. This aspect of Variable in the original teachings gives insight into what a person is designed to see in their environment. 

Are you designed to focus on specific things, or hold a wider view and take in the bigger picture or overview.

Nowhere in the source material is it suggested that Nodal Tone has anything to do with one’s auric Type or manifesting/ creating potential. However, because there is much talk right now about being ‘specific or ‘non-specific’ I thought I would share where this theory originated.

In Human Design, “manifesting” is a question of energetics or mechanics. That is, whether one of the body’s motors (Sacral, Ego, Solar Plexus, or Root) can bring its energy directly to the Throat centre where it is articulated into existence. 

If I step away from human design for a moment and mix my modalities by stepping into energy body speak - We speak things into existence, by pulling them through our energy bodies from our Soul body, (that lives right in the centre of our being, near our heart) through our negative mind, positive mind, neutral mind, into and out into the 3D physical world, through our 3D physical body. 

Each person's desire is truly unique and the way that they manifest will also be based on their energetic design, their ability to emotionally and spiritually alchemise the resistance they have, and their journey with de-conditioning from the cultural, societal and familial conditioning that we are all subjected to.

A key point of Ra’s teaching was that the body is designed to guide the truly differentiated life. This means that each individual has the potential of entering into a totally unique expression of frequency and purpose. Many “manifestation” strategies appear to amplify our unconscious fixation on survival, getting attention, and proving self-worth. As such, this question about how to manifest can often be a distraction from the important process of de-conditioning, where we learn to allow the body to lead and let the mind take its place as a tool, a measurement device, a source of awareness for others, and a witness to life as it unfolds.

John Cole & Amy Lee

Ultimately, we have each been incarnated in human form, at this time in history on this frequency and timeline to experience being human. By which I mean to have an emotional and physical experience (which is only possible in human form) and to learn and expand.

Our birth data holds coded information about the identity, lessons, personality, energy type, design and experience that we are having.

How much control we have over that experience will never be fully known. More and more I believe that our lives are like a choose your own adventure novel; the basic narrative, themes, moral lessons, beginning and end are written, but we get to choose which journey we take at each chapter.

Manifesting for me is actually about tapping into your true desires, by knowing yourself really well. Not wanting what everyone else wants, but listening to your Soul and then uncovering it by aligning your intention, and attention, your energy and your action. De-conditioning, and alchemising to find yourself in alignment with your true and uninhibited self.

I hope this helps,


Dear Ebonie Reading the last issue of Soulacy, I realised that I am in a funk with my life and my business. I thought I was comfortable, but I realise that I am not being honest with myself. I’ve dug down into my true desires and I want to make a complete change in my life. I feel like I want to change everything, my work, my home, my relationship, all of it….but how do I know if I am throwing the bathwater out with the babe?


Hi Claire,

I am writing this response to you on day one of my cycle while binge watching Grand Designs on Netflix. In the last two episodes the people building houses both took on old ‘wrecks’ of a building and in an attempt to restore them.

The general consensus is that whilst sometimes it is easier to start from scratch, there is a certain beauty and magic in making something new out of what already exists.

Having reinvented myself or evolved many times in my life and having assisted many others in doing so too, what I know is that much like restoring an old building, when you start the adventure you might very well have a plan, but in truth you have no idea where the journey will take you and what you might find after you make the leap to creating something new.

My advice is not to get too attached to where you’ll end up specifically but focus on how you want to feel and start saying yes to what truly lights you up and no to anything that is no longer for you.

Be ruthless and courageous with your yeses and nos.

Stay in touch with your desire and allow it to change as you try things and become clearer on what you like and what doesn’t feel as good in reality as you imagined. Stick to your values and you’ll find yourself as the babe bathing in an ocean beyond your current wildest dreams.

X Ebonie

Do you have a question for me? You can whatsapp it to me or slide into my DMs on Instagram.

Soulacy Magazine's mission is to inspire, showcase, & support soulful and purposeful women on their journey of creating a legacy through entrepreneurship. Soulacy Magazine is a digital monthly magazine for soulful women creating a legacy.

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