You may have heard of attachment style in relationships and believe that you are either Anxious or Avoidant. But what if like me you experience both or neither?

Secure Attachment is when you feel safe together and apart.

When being close doesn't affect your sense of self and being apart doesn't affect your sense of self.

Both anxious and avoidant types struggle with feeling safe in relationships.

If you have experienced any sort of trauma it is likely that you don't feel safe in relationship and you may have a dominant attachment style of Anxious or Avoidant. 

Both have (often unconscious) strategies for dealing with the feelings that intimacy brings up.

Anxious attachment seeks comfort via connection and Avoidant attachment seeks comfort via disconnection.

Anxious attachment doesn't know how to feel safe without the closeness of another and Avoidant attachment doesn't feel safe while being close to another.

Attachment style and behavioural response is determined by our...